Monday, September 29, 2008

Hockey Games and Little Kids

Well, it looks like we have a part deux to "Hockey Games and Socialites," which is quite depressing. There shouldn't have to be a part two. I go to hockey games for entertainment. Not to get the urge to burn the world down/pummel random people in the crowd. Sure sometimes I imagine myself wailing on Todd Bertuzzi or Shaun Avery, but that is normal.

No no, the other night at the Stars vs. Blues pre-season game, I had the urge to brutally murder a group of 8 year olds. Turns out both my friend and dad had the same idea. Which made me feel less like a serial killer (or at least I'm in a group of serial killers). These had to be the most obnoxious children I've ever dealt with in my entire life. I was pelted with I'm not even sure how much popcorn, my roommate kept getting jabbed in the back of head with a foam finger. The accompanying adult with these kids proceeded not to do a damn thing about it.

The last 4-5 minutes of the game were the absolute worst. Not only were they throwing popcorn all over the place but they were screaming random sports jargon, and some idiot kid kept screeching, in a voice I will hear in my nightmares, "OUT OF BALANCE! OUT OF BALANCE! OUT OF BALANCE!" He kept that up, for no joke, five minutes. I was about ready to punch a hole through my own head so I wouldn't have to hear it anymore.

Why are kids like this allowed to attend sporting events? Why are they even allowed in public? They should be kept in cages then studied and eventually made infertile so they can't pass on their genes. The human race just doesn't need that.

Whats sad is it looked like these kids had rich parents, which means they will end up at like Harvard or Yale or something stupid and eventually become a congressman or even worse President. I can imagine a press conference consisting entirely of "OUT OF BALANCE!"

Its either that or United States will be a desolate wasteland where we have formed into tribes and scavenge for food.

At least the Stars won 4-3, and it means the regular season is that much closer.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008


America is a fat country and waistbands are getting bigger. Oh ho ho, that was an easy post. Yeah but not really, I was referring more to the whole elastic waistband thing...because people are fat! I'm on a roll!

Ok so yeah...back on topic, elasticity. Today in econ we were talking about elasticity of demand and some other such nonsense that I actually understood. Normally I feel like some kind of idiot in that class, but moving on. Maybe I'm just slow to this realization, but I figure might as well say something.

Why the hell do people whine about gas prices so much? Well I guess I do that too, my problem isn't so much the whining, as it is the fact that people seem to think these gas companies are in the wrong for charging so much. Why wouldn't they? They have no incentive at all to lower gas prices at this point because we are still willing to buy gas.

The problem here is that it would be nigh impossible to go cold turkey on gas, the layout of cities pretty much prevents this. People have to commute to work, which in this country generally means driving from a suburb to downtown. People aren't just going to start leaving at 5am to walk or ride a bike to work. As long as it is available, people will pay for gas to drive to their job, to make money so they can provide for their families and buy more gas.

Honestly though, why would these companies lower gas prices? The incentive really isn't there. People act like they shouldn't be out to make a good profit. The entire purpose of getting of a job, or running a business is to make just as much money as possible. Do I run around declaring some guy is in the wrong because he makes more than he needs just to get by. No, but we seem to feel the need to damn these companies.

Sure this doesn't make them any less evil, as far as I can tell, the heads of Exxon wear top hats, light cigars with handfuls of one-hundred dollar bills and laugh evilly whilst saying "Gooooood, gooooood."

Sunday, September 14, 2008


Well its been quite awhile hasn't it? Over a month in fact. I know I shouldn't deprive the oh so many readers I have out there of my oh so amazing writing abilities and quick wit. (Note: My writing abilities are fairly sub par and my wit isn't all that quick). It just seemed cruel. So um yeah...I guess I should get writing.

This would be much easier if I had something to write about.

Bah, update is on the way sometime soon.